Wow. I never thought I'd be saying this, but I'm actually going to miss the old middle school building I've been in for two years now.
I'm going to miss the hot afternoons and the chilly gyms, the large sports field in the back, the baseball diamond, the blacktop . . .
But most importantly, I'm going to miss my friends.
I made so many new friends at this school. And every day, we talk about the last day of school. We all say we look forward to the end of our middle school experience, but I know we're all going to cry. I'm going to miss seeing the faces of my two best friends on a daily basis, or seeing my crush run down the hallway after some odd seventh graders. I'm going to miss the friends I have in the lower grades, and I'm more importantly going to miss the friends I made in my grade.
Thinking about this now, I'm fourteen years old. I have four years left before I'm legally an adult. And just two left of thinking, "What do I want to do with my life? Where do I want to go to college?" But I have four months left before I start my high school experience. And to be honest, I'm not excited. I'm scared.
I'm going to have to start all over again. All of my friends are going to their home school or to the IB school across town from my home. I'm going to the science and tech school downtown. Instead of the girl with her friends who is entirely comfortable with being loud and weird, I'm going to be the girl in the corner being quiet and subdued. That's not me. And that's why I'm scared.
I don't know what I want to do with my life. I know I want to be successful, as all of us do. But in what field do I want my success? Medicine, engineering, music, writing? Where do I go from here?
All of this stems from realizing how much I don't want to leave the eighth grade . . .
And now I'm just thinking about what will happen. Will Kimberly, Hayley, and I drift apart? Will I continue talking to Carlos? What about Stephanie, or Elliott, or Stefan?
Through every issue I've had this year, I do say it was the best of my life. May 24, 2010, I leave that 100 year old building with no air conditioning, and I won't go back in. The pressure to do my best to adapt is crushing me more than the heat of 10th period Social Studies . . .
Wishing I could replay this year, just once more . . .