www.whyville.net Apr 11, 2002 Weekly Issue

A Response to 'A Perfect Krime'

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A Response to "A Perfect Krime"

Times Writer

After reading a recent article on the thrills of cheating people out of money, I laughed. This mysterious author doesn't seem to realize the irony of his/her situation.

God, people are stupid... or so this scammer says. But really, the stupidity lies in the idiots who think they can cruise through life at others' expense. Think you're a smart guy? Look at the guys at Enron. They thought they were pretty clever. These men were top of their classes, 7-digit income business leaders. You honestly think people are dumb enough to let you slip through the cracks every time? Too bad for you, and I personally will be the first to laugh when you land in jail.

And WE are the greedy ones? Haha, don't get me started. So basically, you're justifying something illegal by saying that it is our fault that people like you exist in the world. Hey, whatever helps you sleep at night, right?

By the way, it might interest you to know that should we ever find out who you are -- which believe me, is entirely possible -- we could have you arrested. The law is an interesting thing, huh?

But the truly ironic thing about this is -- WHYVILLE IS NOT REAL LIFE! Oh wow, you have thousands of clams, you can buy all the cartoon clothing you want! WOO-HOO! Unless I missed something, clams do not translate into dollars; so stop giving yourself so much credit. God only knows how many hours someone so pathetic as yourself has wasted cheating people out of invisible, nonexistent money.

Maybe you consider Whyville to the ideal place for a crime, maybe it gives you some rush that you committed something so romantic as a perfect crime. You try to prove to be so tough, turning yourself in... so original! You think you can scare us by publishing your article? Nevermind that you probably just read some article in a magazine about Jack the Ripper in London, how he sent in letters to a police station giving clues about himself. Well, pin a rose on your nose, you are so original! Ha, ha. Don't make me laugh. Kind of lame that I know whom you are, and I know you are not nearly as tough as you think.

Just know this. Sure, you may have hundreds of accounts, hundreds of thousands of clams... but really, what are you going to do with them? You obviously just do it to laugh at the pain you cause, thinking for a minute that your life has the slightest significance to others. That is really the only reason you commit these crimes, and you know it: to convince yourself that you matter -- and that is the ultimate irony.



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