Little Girl Lost: Epilogue
I'm not bulletproof. I might say that words don't hurt me, but they do. I'm sick and tired of pretending I'm okay. I'm broken. I'm lonely. I'm confused. I have feelings for someone, and I wish I could just get rid of them. I'm stupid, careless, and reckless. I am not the girl everyone thinks I am. I am lost.
My name is Samantha Elizabeth Williams. I'm 15 years old, and I come from a broken home. I'm saying this first because this is something you have to know to understand me. I'm not your average teenage girl. Ive been through some experiences that no one should ever go through. But as my best friend constantly tells me, these things have made me stronger. Even if I don't feel strong.
Now I'm warning you right now, my story is tough to read. Maybe it's not as tragic to you as it is to me. But the experiences that are going to be told, are the ones that have scarred me. They made me who I am today.
Little Girl Lost: Chapter One
September 5, 2011
7:36am
Dear Journal,
Today is my first day at Richmond High School. I'm a sophomore. I'm pretty nervous because I've never been to a school as small as Richmond, and news travels fast in small schools. My schedule seems pretty nice. I already know I'm going to like my English class. My teacher, Mrs. Hanson, whom I met a few days ago while on my tour, used to be a journalist for the New York Times! She's really nice, and I know were going to get along great.
Here's my schedule:
1. English 10 - Hanson
2. Civics - Kullman
3. Girls Choir - Pavlovich
Lunch
4. Geometry - Parnell
5. Chemistry - Meade
6. Seminar - Young
I hope things work out alright, the bell is about to ring so I should probably head towards English.
11:50am
My first 3 classes were pretty good. I really like English class, and my Civics teacher doesn't seem too bad either. Mr. Pavlovich is an interesting person. He's really young, and his teaching style is hard to explain. But I really like him. I'm not too sure about the whole girls' choir thing though. We'll have to wait and see about that. I'm sitting by myself for lunch. I don't really want to make friends here. It never goes well because someone always leaves me somehow.
I was right about news traveling fast in a small school. I'm known as "that new emo girl". Lovely. Well, I guess at least if I'm "emo", people will leave me alone.
Time for 4th hour . . . Later diary.
10:23pm
I went to the resource room during 4th hour. We were taking a pre-test. There was this boy, he looked around my age, who caught my eye. He smiled at me, and kept looking at me all hour. I don't know what he's thinking, but there is no way I'm getting involved with anyone. Friendship or relationship-wise.
Another day to face tomorrow . . . Goodnight.
