www.whyville.net Oct 21, 2012 Weekly Issue


Fool Everyone

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I smile with no emotion. I laugh with no voice. I cry with no tears. I hide within my pain, out and away form the eye of oblivious beings. Then without thinking, I put everything away in its drawer and pull out my mask. The mask that hides everything I refuse to reveal. The mask that fools every blind eye.

These endless thoughts of ending break through me each and every night. These scars haunt me from within; I can't get out. It's terrorizing, too scary to think about.

This pain is too extreme, too serious. Almost endless. Why must I suffer? Why must I be inflicted with these sick emotions?

Those screams of anger kill my ears. Every blow hitting me deeper and deeper each time; the pain rushing through my blood. This pressure is too intense, the attention too obvious.

I hide a lot. So much that I'm not there anymore. I'm a shadow in the night; the ray of sunshine in the day. I'm always there, never standing out whatsoever.

My mask is too strong.

They think I'm normal. They think I'm just fine. They don't think about me at all. They don't care about me at all. They never did.

Time to hide away again.

My mask flies off from my wretched face, the emotions the mask could withstand pouring out immediately. I cried out in internal pain, its intensity overwhelming. I tugged at my useless hair, cringing in result. I then curled my body downward, hiding my hideous face from the world.

I loathe myself. I can't bear to look at the mirror, afraid that it would break. I cower away with baggy clothes, hiding any shape of my body. My hair is what I despise the most. The way it is pin-straight, its color horrendous. My imperfections add on to the pain. My flaws are hidden with my mask.

My mask is my salvation. It is magical. It is what casts a spell on wondering eyes, making them believe that I'm okay. That nothing is wrong.

My mask fools everyone.

 

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