www.whyville.net Jul 27, 2014 Weekly Issue

Whyville Poet

A Wacky Whyville Poem

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Author's Note: I would like to thank PAlNTlNG, bibi4evr, MeBeLizzi, smile255, CAlR0, RinAndLen, jordanew, DahCutie and xBeccaxxx for helping me to make this stupid/silly poem possible. Enjoy.

Through technology, Internet and equipment alike
there is a place called Whyville that you might like.
Whyville is rather small; nothing like you've seen before.
Let me tell you about it; through adventures and more . . .

Noobs are taking over, demanding clams left and right.
You better hand some over or they invade the woods tonight.
Bibi4evr adheres, Jordanew uses them to look like she has friends,
The rest prepare for Whyville War Two while CALR0 thanks God he doesn't attend.

Jump to the BBS where there's always a debate,
only this time it takes a turn to "yo mama" jokes they make.
MeBeLizzi and PAlNTlNG accept the challenge, then retaliate.
Jordanew just laughs as CAlR0 tells this 90s time traveler to recalibrate.

Now something weird is going on with user's face parts;
things that aren't supposed to be animated or moving all of the sudden starts.
MeBeLizzi has a breakdown, Bibi4evr thinks she's cute,
CAlR0 calls an exorcist, RinAndLen says it's the City Workers impute.
PAlNTlNG uses this opportunity to gesture her hate,
Smile255, DahCutie and xbeccaxxx work what they got, knowing they look great.

Not only are parts moving, but now there are two of you!
You meet your Whyville clone, whatever will you do?
CAlR0 and MeBeLizzi become love struck with double of who they are,
Bibi4evr, RinAndLen and xbeccaxxx befriend the replica not caring it's bazaar.
PAlNTlNG has a theory that they come from PlanetDelp,
She thinks Bibi4evr is behind it and will become City Hall if we don't help.
Smile255 has a speculation that CAlR0 is the reason this is done,
DahCutie and Jordanew battle their twins shouting, "THERE CAN ONLY BE ONE!"

To make matters worse, another fight stirs on the forums.
A battle over your favorite food is taken to the junkyard; seven is the quorum.
Jordanew blows it off, MeBeLizzi calls food fight,
DahCutie joins in throwing projectiles of the foods they don't like.
Xbeccaxxx breaks out in dance, PAlNTlNG force feeds the hater,
Bibi4evr dresses for the attack and banishes them across the Whyville equator.
RinAndLen knocks them out, but certainly not before
CAlR0 goes Randy Marsh on them screaming, "BRUH," evermore.

Then, thanks to all you rebels the City Workers start a law
that we all have to dress like rocks, but yours happens to be extra small.
RinAndLen and MeBeLizzi hack into the system to fix this pixel mistake,
Smile255 rams her rock into others hoping they will break.
DahCutie, Bibi4evr and Jordanew have not one care in the world,
Xbeccaxxx calls her friends; on large rocks water balloons are hurled.
CAlR0 starts a petition that grants rights to little rocks,
He preaches size is not important, the bigger you are the more space you block.

Now I wish that you could visit and experience the overjoyed,
but CAlR0's ego filled his head, it exploded, and now Whyville is destroyed.
After this tragic incident the number of survivors were five,
Jordanew got so mad she wished he didn't explode so she could skin that boy alive.
Bibi4evr wanted revenge; to sacrifice what's left to the Color Toucan Gods,
Smile255 picked up the pieces of his littered ego left by the woods in wads.
RinAndLen didn't care, only happy she survived,
DahCutie was eager to eat CALR0 after she was food deprived.

So there you have it, a typical Whyville tale.
Come join us,
with only the survivors left we need more numbers to prevail!


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