www.whyville.net Jul 31, 2016 Weekly Issue



MeBeLizzi
Veteran Whyville Poet

It's Kinda Funny But I Can't Laugh

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It's kinda funny but I can't laugh
You said you wanted to hold my hand
Be by my side as I walked through life
And I believed you.
You bought me off with words and woos
The kind of thing a father should never do
But I was fascinated with you
So I fell for it.
I let you fill my head with dreams
Little scenarios and fantasies
Doing the things I always dreamed we could
Being who I always dreamed we could be
And then you left.
Again.
How dare you do that to me again?
I wasted my time for someone who doesn't even have the guts to say goodbye.
You walked out once, you walked out twice.
I shouldn't be surprised.
But that doesn't stop me from crying into my pillow at night.
You're my father, but I wanted you to be my dad
4 years ago I lost all I had
I wanted you to patch the holes
The ones you punctured so long ago.
You promised and I believed you
You lied and I cried
It's kinda funny but I can't laugh
Because I really thought I could trust you, Dad
So you ran off to do who the hell knows what, and I'm sitting here wondering what I did wrong
What did I do to make you hate me so much?
Your own flesh and blood.
Why am I not good enough for you? And for that matter, my sister too?
What did we ever do?
How could you leave your daughters to fend on their own?
Mom does her best but every girl needs her dad to remind her she's not alone.
It's kinda funny but I can't laugh.
I really thought you loved me.
But you ripped out my heart and left me hollow.
Tear streaked pillow cases, and bloodshot eyes
It's no secret that this girl cries
I cry for my mom and I cry for my dad
I cry for the family I never had
I cry for my grandpa who I miss like hell
And I cry and I pray that one day,
All will be well.

 

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