www.whyville.net Aug 15, 2004 Weekly Issue

Times Joker!

What's So Funny??

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Editor's Note: We got a small bunch of excellent submissions for the jokes contest this week, especially in the last day or two, so instead of publishing them all at once, we'll give you a great joke each week for a while! For starters, Hanni319 gets silly with several story-jokes and quick punch-liner or two. Have fun!

Hey all! I have a few jokes for the contest that I know you'll just love!

First Joke
A pig walks into a restaurant and says, "Can I have a glass of water?" The waiter brings him a water and the pig drinks it. After that. the pig asks for directions to the bathroom, goes, and leaves.

Another pig walks into the same restaurant and asks for some water. The waiter brings the second pig the water. He drinks it, asks for directions to the bathroom, goes, and leaves.

The third and fourth pigs walk in and the waiter says, "Let me guess, some water?" The pigs nod and drink the water, go to the bathroom, and leave. By time a fifth pig comes in the waiter has the water sitting there waiting for him.

The waiter says, "Mr. Pig, when you are finished the bathroom is down the hall." The pig says, "I'm sorry, I don't need the restroom. I'm the fifth little piggy and I go wee-wee-wee all the way home!!"

(Get it? This little pig went to market, this little piggy went home, this little piggy had roast beef, this little piggy had none, and THIS LITTLE PIGGY WENT WEE-WEE-WEE ALL THE WAY HOME!) LOL!

Second Joke
Betty adopted two dogs and named them Timex and Rolex. When her friend asked where she came up with those names, she replied, "HELLO?!?! They're watchdogs!"

Third Joke
After Mozart passed away, the town drunk heard some strange noises coming from the grave site. Terrified, he ran and got the priest. He bent close to the headstone and heard some faint, unrecognizable music. The frightened priest got the town magistrate.

The magistrate listened for a minute and said, "Ah yes, that's Mozart's Ninth Symphony, being played backwards. And there's the Eighth... the Seventh... the Sixth...."

Then he stood up and said, "Nothing to worry about. It's just Mozart decomposing."

Fourth Joke
Did you hear the one about the teacher who was arrested trying to board an airplane with a compass, a protractor, and a calculator? He was charged with carrying weapons of math instruction!

Hope you liked them!



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