www.whyville.net Jan 9, 2008 Weekly Issue



Shorty799
Guest Writer

My Side of Parent Divorces

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Shorty799 here, talking about something that many people have been experiencing a lot this year: divorces. I know from experience. A sad experience that many people have endured.

My experience happened when I was four years old, a preschooler. My brother was eight.

My mother said my dad had sent her an e-mail to her while he was on one of his business trips. He basically said, "I don't love you anymore."

I can never imagine my mom and dad being together. I was too young to remember how they acted with each other or what it was like to be a full family. I don't remember what I did, whether I cried and locked myself up in my dark room or just sat there confused; thoughts rushing throughout my brain, "Why? Why me? Why do we deserve this? Where did the love go?" and my heart pounded against my chest as I heard it ring in my eardrums.

What hurts more than my mom telling me that she was up the whole night having tears slither down her cold face as she cried herself to sleep, is knowing that my dad couldn't wait to do it in person. One of the harshest break-ups is over text, letter, or e-mail.

My dad moved away and my brother and I were raised up my mom. My dad missed all of my kindergarten-fourth grade school productions because of his business trips. My dad very rarely could visit us because of the pricey plane tickets. Thankfully, in fifth grade he came to my talent show in which my friends and I were in.

I always saw my friends' dads because at my school they had a "donuts for dad" before Father's Day. I was in third grade, the year I had just moved here. I wasn't used to seeing so many dads and I barely EVER saw my dad. My best friend, Michelle, took one look at my face and saw the sadness in my eyes as they welled up and my nose started to run. She took me to the bathroom, gave me a paper towel, and hugged me. I cried, and cried, and cried some more. Eventually, I got over it.

When I turned about eight or nine, my father remarried to a woman who grew close to my heart. I think after four or five years of marriage, it fell apart. They got divorced and of course, my brother and I suffered once more. I began to really like Kim and her kids and poof! They were gone forever. Out of my reach, out of my touch. I still miss her, but I would do anything for my dad.

One year later, my dad proposed to his high school ex-girlfriend. I have met her once and she seems like a very nice, beautiful lady. Hopefully, I will learn to love her like I did Kim. They plan to get married this summer and my dad, her, and her daughter plan to move out here. Soon, my dad should be done with these crazy business trips.

My mom raised us up very nicely. She was able to keep a roof over our heads and has NEVER put us in daycare. She tries her best to support us, no matter what the price. I would do anything for her because I am so grateful to have her in my life. Though my parents are separated and will most likely not rekindle their love, I love them both dearly. I love my dad so much. You can't force people to do anything. It may be hard to face it but you grow. You get used to it.

Anyway, that is MY story. I looked up some research and found that a test in 1980 proved that less than 10% of children receive any type of support from relatives during the divorce. Also, each year over one million children suffer from the divorce of their parents!! Many people will have their parents divorce sometime before they turn eighteen. Some kids at my school have parent divorces that affect their school life. They get low grades on tests when they are the smartest kids in the class!

I'm not saying divorces are bad. They are but you have to face it. Be strong. Be in control of YOUR life. Don't let anyone change that. If you love them, you will sacrifice whatever it is you need to.

Please feel free if you have any questions or advice if you are going through a parent divorce.

Shorty799 off to go watch T.V. with my mom :) *clickeroo*

Author's Note: Sorry if I offended anyone by making it about me or anything. Sources of information: http://www.heritage.org/Research/Family/BG1373.cfm and http://www.childadvocate.net/divorce_effects_on_children.htm

 

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