G'day Whyville. We've all had this cross our minds, "Why did that guy just run over my friend?" It's not because he's rude, or because he has rabies, but it's because he suffers from SRS. Yes, the dreaded Scion Roadkill Syndrome. The most horrid part is; it's not cureable. No matter the color, the size, the accessories (I'm talking about Whyvillians) they will run-over ANYTHING. Now, if you are squeamish I would recommend stop reading NOW.
Ah, what a lovely day at the beach. The sun's shining, the fish have been cleaned up, and there are beach balls everywhere. Now Whyvillians, I ask you this: If you were sunbathing and happened to open your eyes and see no sun, but a scion parked on you . . . How would you feel? Well this was my exact reaction:
Look at the lovely person with a bust bigger than her head, not even considering/noticing that someone has just been run over. Why doesn't SHE have a scion parked on her?
Can't you just hear the music? *Dun DUN Dun Dun Dun Dun DUN!*
After being reassured about eight times that the beach is NOT heaven and that I am not dead. I made up my mind to interview my hero, before the newscasters did. Everyone meet Kitty1917.
CupOfCake: You saved my life!
Kitty1917: Yes, yes I did o_o.
CupOfCake: What does it feel like to be a hero?
Kitty1917: Well, it makes me recognized and famo -- I mean helpful!
CupOfCake: I need to congratulate you for well, you know, saving my life and all. :)
Kitty1917: Well you SHOULD.
CupOfCake: *Eck Hem* Thank you for saving my life, you are a lovely person/hero!
Kitty1917: You're welcome, it's just another day's work!
Just then the newscast people, who are if I do say so myself, are QUITE rude, all swarmed Kitty1917 and I think one of my limbs is missing now. No one even asked if I was okay. They all swarmed the person who still had her left arm and had NOT been run over by a scion.
After 4 hours of hearing over 100 reporters say, "Kitty, when did you realize this was a life or death situation?" and "Kitty, if I do say so myself you look absolutely gorgeous." Good grief.
Oh my, one of them ate Kitty! Oh the horror!
Now, Whyville. I hope you've learned the following: never park your scion on a citizen, never leave your car on a citizen then go to "chat" with your friends, and once you've been saved by your hero . . . never stay around long enough for the newscasters to come. Because this is what happens:
Ciao Whyville, I need to go find my left arm . . . hey kid, that is NOT a shovel!