www.whyville.net Jul 6, 2008 Weekly Issue

Guest Writer

I Can Do This

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"You deserve so much better than him."
"It's his loss."
"Well, uh, he wasn't even that cute anyways."

These are the words my friends have been using for the past seven months in hopes that for once, my brain will process them. Seven months ago I fell hard. No, not literally. Seven months ago is when I met him. Every day since then has been full of lies, confusion, and mind games. He loves me, he loves me not. The other day I was flipping through one of my many teen magazines, and came across an article titled, "How to Get over Him". Now this is my type of magazine.

Step 1: Delete him from your Facebook, Myspace, etc.

Okay, that wasn't as hard as I thought it was. A click here, a click there, done.

Step 2: Delete his number from your phone.

Wow, I have to actually delete his number? What if I need to call him? No, I'm stronger than this. It's just a phone number, and it's not like I'll be needing it any time soon.

Step 3: Delete every e-mail or text message.

I can do this. One by one I read them over, sometimes more than once. Most of them make me mad, not because they were mean messages, but because I know everything he ever said to me was a lie. I wasted seven months on a guy that considered me to be his backup.

Step 4: Accept that you need to get over him.

Okay, well, I already know that I need to get over him. That's why I'm doing all of these steps, right? There has to be more to it. Maybe I need to say it out loud. I need to get over him. Now say it like you mean it. I need to get over him! After saying it a bunch of times, I finally started to believe it.

Step 5: Find someone else.

So soon? I don't want another boyfriend, yet. Well, my next door neighbor is a fox. Oh, so is the guy I met at the movies last night. Yeah, I can do this.

Although talking to my friends and following the advice of this magazine did help, I got over him my own way. When he signed in on MSN, I didn't say hello. I stopped commenting on his Facebook and looking through his pictures. If I looked at the clock and the time was 11:11, I didn't wish for him to like me or for an apology. It was tough at first, but eventually I no longer wanted to do any of these things. I realized that what my friends were telling me was true after all. I do deserve better, and I will find it eventually.

My advice to anyone going through a similar situation is to find closure. The process of finding closure is different for everyone, but it's anything a person does that allows then to say, "I'm over you." It isn't a simple task, but hey, we're all in this together.


Editor's Note: We've all gone through our share of heartbreak, I know I definitely have! But, it is important to remember that we all heal in different ways. What works for someone, might not be the answer for someone else. So, remember to be sensitive and respectful to each other when you are trying to heal from a break up. And yes, you will eventually be able to move on, and yes, there is someone who is right for you :).


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