www.whyville.net Aug 3, 2008 Weekly Issue

Whyville Columnist

Seriously Funny Investigations

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Batteries. A necessity we use in our everyday lives. You probably don't realize that life would be tragic without batteries. You'd have get up off the couch to change the channel on the TV. *gasp* I know, tragic. But wait, that's not even the point of this article. Ok so let's get to the point.

The point is, we have all different kinds of batteries. AA, AAA, C, D . . . wait. There's no B! What is wrong with the world that we leave out important alphabet letters? Where is the B, and why isn't there a B battery? My brain tells me that it's because whoever invented batteries never went to kindergarten. Or maybe it's just to confuse us.

Morgan612: Why aren't there B batteries?

bart16794: Because A is the more important letter. I mean c'mon A is first in the alphabet. What an accomplishment.
ashley409: Because more people's names start with A than B.
megchic23: There aren't B batteries because the makers are too stupid, they skipped a letter which is B because there are C and D batteries and they probably never guessed it either.
Amanda: Because batteries starts with B so it would be weird to say B batteries.
socer4eva: Hmmm . . . maybe the guy who invented batteries wasn't very familiar with what we call the "modern day alphabet"

Hmm. Interesting. I still think the inventor of batteries never went to kindergarten. Wait . . . to invent something you have to be smart . . . to be smart you have to pass kindergarten . . . okay never mind!

Well, folks, I've done some extensive research. The truth is, once upon a time, there really were B batteries. They were long and skinny and used to run vacuums or radios. Yes! It's true. They don't make them anymore because there is not a use for them due to advances in technology. They were also very powerful which we don't have a need for anymore.

I've solved another mystery. High five!

Thanks for reading, this has been another . . . We interrupt this program so Morgan can continue reading "Breaking Dawn".


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